Words and Thoughts

April 22nd 2018

Earth day is every day.
Every day is a blessing.
A day wasted is a day you’ll never get back.
Time will not pause for you to catch up.
I feel this most with my dog.
His time may run out before mine.
His biological clock runs a beat faster.
There is no way to slow it down.
No pause button, or batteries to take out.
A forced form of acceptance.
A bending of the knees to kneel powerless.
I can only record – photos, videos, sound.
Play backs of a past, untouchable.
Moments like the wind. Unseen used to be’s.
Reasons for extra long hugs.
An extra walk for the day.
Extra, just because it’s possible.

August 12th 2017

Ring, ring
Hello?
Hi yes, I’m looking for talent.
For what?
Talent.
Oh. Well, we don’t have that.
What do you have?
We’ve got cats in stock.
Cats?
Copy, cats. Cats and sheep.
For sure. Baaa bye.

August 11th 2017

Do you know that?
Well, how about this?
Are you aware?
And you’re sure about?
Now, I’d just like to say…
Have you heard?

July 15th 2017

Old Gum
//
My stomach keeps lurching
My fingers are numb
Something is bubbling,
and it’s growing some

Big thoughts for big dreams
Where else to run
Mind keeps popping
thoughts like old gum

//

June 8th 2017

With every gain, give.

The Universe is not out here to make you happy.
That is up to you.

So with each time you land a step up – take some time to reflect back.
and give.
Give to yourself or give to someone else.
Give to the Earth.
Give something back.
It could be time spent with someone, it doesn’t have to cost you money.

Rewards are rarely handed out in this life.
There is no need for them.
Ego will argue otherwise.

April 22nd 2017

Transformation is a process that can lead to a beautiful outcome. The more pain you work through means that there is just that much more for you to change. Be not afraid of the feelings that will arise – the frustration and thoughts in your head leaving you with doubt. Those are just hurdles. Sometimes the reason for pain is from past experiences that you must overcome and face. Even when you did not chose to go through it. Stay truthful in your quest to freedom. Fulfillment is as close as you make it.

April 19th 2017

Are things going way too fast
Do you even notice the time pass
Our minds are glued in
No real escape
We were born into this place

April 18th 2017

It’s never too late to change something about yourself.
Especially if that thing is calling on you to wake up and take notice.
Authenticity plays a huge part in this.
You don’t have to change anything about yourself. Ever.
No one is going to make you do anything different if you don’t want to.
The power of human will can be monumental.
Question why you’re being pulled in certain directions.
See if going a different way is actually helpful.
You never know unless you give it a shot. If ultimates scare you, get rid of them. Don’t let your mind work in the realm of forever if the thought of forever terrifies you. Just think about the now.

April 16th 2017

Your emotions will either keep you grounded or cause you to fly like a tornado.
Such a watery substance, emotions can be.
The way emotions flow in and out, seep through cracks and fill up our bodies is a wonderful part of being human.
The motion of emotions when controlled can lead to tremendous discoveries about the self.
Emotions will either eat up your energy or give you wings.
When you feel blue, your emotions can drain your brain and leave you feeling hungover.
On the flip side, when you feel good about yourself, you can literally accomplish anything you set your mind to.
The choice is always your own.

April 13th 2017

Define you.
What things in this world help identify you. Make you.
What are you attracted to?
What do you naturally attract?
What are your limits? And hesitations?
If you care about growing, you’ll understand these definitions of you can fluxuate.
Don’t worry about coming up with an ultimate and forevermore definition of you. You just need to have an idea for the meantime.
Because too often, people we meet will try and create the definition of you for you. If you are not solid enough, your shape will mold and bend at the will of others. Bend at the will of you.

April 11th 2017

If you have a dream, stick with it.
It’s nice to gain opinions of others, to hear ideas and to be open minded.
But at the end of the day, it’s your dream and you are the one who has to go out and create a difference.
People can help make that happen along the way. No problem there.
Trust your heart and what your instincts tell you.
Maybe an offer is too good to be true.
Perhaps your initial thought was the best one.
Just don’t waste your time fulfilling requests and offers from other people.
You and your mind matter.

April 10th 2017

Dramatic changes happen when you need them the most.
Spinning off course just to get back on track is a lot to deal with.
Let the full Moon do her thing.
Know what kind of ride you’re on for the moment.
And if you can, try and enjoy it.
For all things shall pass.
And time will bring much more.

April 9th 2017

Last night was one of those nights filled with tosses and turns and thoughts about what’s not right.

Poem below is about waking with the same thoughts you went to bed with.

//
Wake with me
Said thoughts in my head
See what lies beyond your bed

Can’t you see
Thoughts from the night before
are still right here, with some more

There are no secrets
All that’s been said has been done
It’s not worth it, so have your fun

April 8th 2017

//
Head Space

Sitting under Sun so bright
my mind sparks thoughts
as seen as right

Who but you to have the might
to dream and churn
hopes in the night

Pretty little head, sit tight
as your body moves
through this life

//

April 6th 2017

//
To Meet Yourself

What if you could meet you?
In the flesh
Eye to eye
Our thoughts as one
Under the same Sun

Would you like you?
Standing there
Eyes so wide
Breath shared as one
Subconscious overrun

What would you do?
Say something?
Forces collide
Too real to be a phantom
of a life that just begun
//

April 5th 2017

Do you make the choice?
Or does the choice make you?

Those were lines from a show I was watching last night and it got me thinking. The more open your mind is to accepting possibilitites, the more blurred those two notions become.

You are the choice. You are part of it.
Each thought you choose to run with morphs your choices even further.
Each step you take in life will change you, too.

Ever are we evolving and growing. Never are we stuck.

April 4th 2017

Head Space
//
Your head may be full of thoughts, no doubt
Thinking things just floating about
Listening in is good to do
Just be sure you know it’s true
That not all those thoughts
Have to define you for you

April 3rd 2017

Your personal achievements and goals in life are important to keep in mind throughout your day to stay in focus. Be sure to give credit to your process. Take a moment to see how far you have come, and you will find a natural way to spark your purpose. Maybe even see your hard work in a different light.

Achievement in life is success as defined by you. You can lower or raise expectations so long as you stay positive and realistic.

Achievement is when you have defined what that looks like, and set out to conquer it.

April 2nd 2017

Honing in on the obvious to make use of your current situation is one of the toughest things to do. If only we had a crystal ball to look into the future. Or a time portal we can step through to gain insight.

Sometimes the solution is simple, staring right in front of you. Other times, the answers to what you deeply wish to know are behind a thin veil, awaiting a breath of enlightenment to see through the fog.

It helps to know what you want. Your actions stem from your motivations.
If what you want cannot be simply defined, try to have an idea of what don’t want.

Moving through life in a balanced manner is tough enough. Make it easier by defining the source of what your purpose here on Earth is. You don’t have to tell anyone and it doesn’t have to be the same each day, but you should take the time to figure it out.

April 1st 2017

A word of caution for how you justify actions in your life.
Take mental note if you are justifying what you are doing because you know it’s not what you should be doing.

Anyone can have an opinion that will be the basis for an argument.
Any argument.
Same goes with giving meaning to a cause.
You can give that cause any meaning you choose to give it.

Justify actions of others only to an extent of being able to understand that other person. When you justify to the point of damaging your moral compass, then your justice is more of an excuse.

You can justify as much as you want about the kind of food you’re eating, amount of exercise you’re getting and the people you hang out with. But at the end of the day, it is you that is in that body of yours, making your way through this life. Why not see things for how they are, stop making excuses and start creating healthy change?

March 31st 2017

Anticipation is bad for the heart but good for the soul.

Trust that worry and fear from anticipation can be cured with one big breath.
Think about it.
Anticipation stems from wanting a positive outcome. A happy end result.
And there is nothing wrong with that.
Understand the process, and the way your thoughts move about in this state.
Do you repeat lists in your head?
Things you must remember?
Write all that stuff down. It’s a waste of space in your head to be keeping track of items when you are already keeping track of them. Trust yourself more. Know yourself better.

March 30th 2017

Early morning during the sunrise a couple days ago, we stood watching the mesmerizing light hit the Golden Gate Bridge.

At the same time, a Coast Guard helicopter was circling the bay, looking for a body.

The water was still. Eerily calm.

Light beams kissed the surrounding hilltops with gentle rays of golden hues.

And the search continued.

Relentless is the Ocean. And so, a poem.

Ocean Deep
//
Never, says the Ocean.
How dare you wish to try me?

Do you not know?
Have you not heard?

The Ocean is a beast.
Relentless and mighty.

Her gentle waves will play
you dumb

Death rocks below
where you just swum

Take one look
you could be done

There is no balance
with this one

Go ahead, test the water
Do it for the others

Dip your skin
Drown your fear

I will wait right here.

March 27th 2017

Mighty stays the mind that submerges into something completely new.
Solid stays the self when engaged instead of lost in thought.
Content stays the heart when worry is met with trust.

March 26th 2017

Late last night, Nordy and I drove up the 5 North from Los Angeles to Santa Cruz. We arrived shortly before 3AM to find his father asleep on the couch, waiting to greet us with bear hugs.

The morning sky was a wash of grey. Mist hanging around the nostrils.

And so, I wrote a little poem about the dreamy lazy happiness I feel when I visit Capitola.

//
She woke up in Santa Cruz

Oh, Capitola, mist by the sea
She travelled through the night
to be in reach of your dear cove

Early morning beckons WAKE UP
sleepy eyes! She turns her head instead
to spills dreams on the seagrove

Speckled surfers spotted, dotted on waves
Slowly her mind wakes
and stays hazy for lazy Sundays.
//

March 25th 2017

Stop feeling threatened by another person’s creativity or beauty by feeling admiration instead.
To often our Ego gets in the way of being able to see another person for how they are representing themselves. Our Ego dismisses empathy. Ego puts us in the center of the spinning universe and when that happens, it’s hard to grow and see clearly.
Admiration puts Ego aside by allowing the self to be fully present in the awe that is being exhibited.
Admiration stems from love. Whatever comes from the heart is emotional and weighted. So easily does the pendulum swing the other way when dealing with matters of the heart.

March 24th 2017

The creative mind must flow freely in order to be connected to the source of inspiration.

My favorite healer, Naha Armady, once said that our bodies act like dryer machines. We pick up energetic lint throughout our day that needs to be cleaned out.

This energetic lint naturally accumulates as we maneuver about our lives.

Eventually, you get to a point where you feel suffocated. Weighed down. Tired.
And you know you’re eating well and sleeping alright.
So what is all that extra gunk?
It’s a sign you need to cleanse yourself energetically.
Being bogged down with energetic dead weight can block your creative flow and cause you to feel drained.

Know what lets your mind go.
For me, I will post a photo on Instagram, do a Daily post here or draw and feel like I have put forth an artistic bit of myself. This then opens up my brain to be able to focus on something else.
Reading is another way I distract my mind and let it rejuvenate without having to be asleep or in meditation mode.

Being a part of this world can sometimes blind you to how connected you are to each and every thing around you. We can get lost in the chaos by closing up and not thinking about how these energies can still affect you. Having a present body on Earth means you’re contributing to and collecting energies around you.

Never lose sight of how your presence leaves an impact.

March 23rd 2017

Life is in a constant state of flux.
We all know that.
Sometimes changes are unpredictable and out of your control.
It can be hard to stay in the moment when the moment seems fleeting.
Focus on what you do have control over. And develop a sense of understanding that if change is always happening, then change will happen again. This state of the moment is temporary. All moments are.

March 22nd 2017

Poem about not being able to sleep, and how the next day still calls.

Up
//
Be as it may
The callings for the day

Sway away soiree
Becoming my madre

Hazy-dazy eyes fill my
Breakfast plate

My eyes want to close
My brain won’t obey

Been up all night
So now I’m up all day

March 21st 2017

Time away from something is time gained in something else.

Today my thoughts are focused on seeing my future, and what that really looks like.
It is a rainy Tuesday in Los Angeles and the damp air is calling for a deeper look within.
Look inwards to see outwards.

Humans have free will. Yes, we can argue about the extent of our freedom as we live in societies, but essentially we are free beings. Free to think. Take that down a Descartes route and think therefore you are.

The future is truly all in your mind.

March 15th 2017

Vibe on your own high frequency.
No one but you can let you be
Make it a point to voice when you see
Alternative ways to your reality
Effortless breath, seek positivity
Mind yourself, let me be me.


March 14th 2017

Time continues to go. With or without your awareness.
The recent time change in California has extended our daylight and thus my happiness.
Spring can be smelt in the air and with that, the promise of a warm summer is near.
Cobwebs have started to gather in corners as spiders awake from their winter hibernation.
The peach trees are in full blossom mode and the ever growing traffic in Los Angeles pushes onwards.
Aching for a day at the beach, toes burnt from hot sand.
Where it’s too bright to read a book and too cold to swim.
But it’s California, and my heart is buried here, deeper than the roots of palm trees.

March 10th 2017

What You Can
//
Focus on what you can control
The rest is obsolete.

At the center of you mind
Lies strength for inner peace

The world will keep on spinning
Regardless of retreat

Grass grows wild as souls leave Earth
This whole cycle is on repeat

Seek to strengthen inner you
Feel more and more complete

March 10th 2017

The next time you find yourself in a calm state, pause and take notice.
Question – how can you maintain this same mentality during the next coming chaotic moment?
Life is full of chaos, we all know that. Friction, hiccups and bumps are vital for expansion.
We cannot control all the intricate delicate movements in life. And that should be a liberating feeling because you boil down your focus into things that actually matter.
Respond rather than react.
You do so by staying calm.
You know how to stay calm by exploring what it is really like to be calm.
A peaceful mind leads to a peaceful body which in turn leads to peaceful actions.

March 9th 2017

Compete only to bring out the very best in you.

Competition is healthy when competition keeps you motivated.
When you add your Ego into the mix, competition turns sour.
You start to focus on the Who and lose focus on the very task you are improving upon.

Dismiss the Ego and focus on the excitement behind what you are interested in.
The fight to save one’s ego is an act of self-depreciation.
Think about it.

March 8th 2017

Poem about all that has come before in the very same spot you’re standing on.

Before the Found
//
How amazing would it be
To stick a finger into the ground
And hear smell taste and see
All that came before I was found.

Go deeper, whispers the trees
Allow your body to be unbound.
Take all the time you need.
I will not say a sound.
//

Photo of Jordon Chu

March 7th 2017

Flip the switch in your brain to healthy thoughts today.

Emotions are like water in a bowl.
Once the water starts stirring in one direction, it takes energy and focus to stir emotions another way.

The stirs sit in your chest until another direction is met.
Another, more powerful direction that is.

You can choose what emotions spill out and go into the bowl.
You can even choose the direction in which it goes.
And you are responsible for your bowl of emotions.
The whole bowl. Not just some of it.

March 6th 2017

Life happens in a series of moments and chances.
Tap into how these opportunities occur in your life to better understand the flow of life.

For me, the more I take photos, the more I get to explore the realm of chance.
Chance is like a wild card.
Sometimes a brilliant moment occurs right before my eyes and I am able to capture and preserve that sequence in time.
At other times, a would-be amazing moment trickles away. Poof. Gone forever.

Luck has nothing to do with it.
Luck reserves a thought of deserving.
And Luck helps people make sense of a situation. To give it meaning when sometimes, simply, things just happen.
Go beyond the complex layers of thinking and choose simple, present time.
You’ll find yourself able to experience more and more moments because you’ll actually be there presently to witness them.

March 5th 2017

Compassion.

I’ve been meditating on Compassion for the past few days.
What it means to have compassion and how being compassionate isn’t always easy.
Compassion requires a strong moral compass of understanding what is right and what is wrong.
And then acting on in. You can’t be compassionate by thinking and sitting there. Compassion requires you to take some form of action.

Saying No when you should say No, is an act of compassion.
Explaining how someone is being out of line, is an act of compassion.
Why? Because you care enough to say something.
If you don’t care, and you don’t believe you have the ability to make positive change in the community, then you lack compassion.

Compassion is action fueled by a desire to make something better.
Compassion encompasses belief and faith and hope for the future.
Compassion is tough to swallow when you have to step up your game, but Compassion done right, leads to growth.

Grow on, now.

March 3rd 2017

My yoga instructor ended class with this saying:

‘Vulnerability is a strength when you’re in a safe place.’

And I agree.

Vulnerability is often seen as a weakness.
When explored properly, being vulnerable simply means being open.
Being open is a healthy way to instigate the right type of change.

Vulnerability encompasses empathy.
I invite you to be a little more open today.

March 2nd 2017

What to do when the real world takes energy and the dream world keeps you up?

Do something active.
Don’t just sit there thinking.
Perpetual thinking with no real purpose can be a downward spiral.

When the mind is left to wander to pass time, it leaves the mind with little room to fuel meaningful thoughts. The mind bored is a mind at trouble.

The mind as curious, however, is much different.
Curiosity stems from a focus. And thus the mind stays tuned to the right frequency of thoughts.

When you find your mind on an endless wander, make your body join in and go somewhere. Do something.

March 1st 2017

Empathy to each other’s passions in a relationship is key to smooth sailings.
Recognize the value in the potential of commitment to a practice.

February 28th 2017

This year is too, flying.

Time seems to go by quicker the older I get.
Theory that remains to be proven – We get used to how a minute feels. And an hour. And then weeks and months go by just like that.

Or we are all so focused on being in the present moment.
Sometimes in that moment just ahead. The feeling of anticipation can play major tricks on perceptions of time.

Down the rabbit hole, shall we?

February 27th 2017

My brain was vividly awake at 3AM this morning.
Normally I scramble up the sheets on the bed.
Cocooning into a deep turmoil of realization that sleep is far from near.
Instead, I got up.
I went outside.
And I said, out loud (as crazy as that seems, verbalization is confirmation) how I wish for the very best version of me.
The air was thick.
Almost edible.
No sounds.
Just my breathing audible.
I went back inside.
Turned on my computer and finally accepted the overdue software update.
Found my camera and removed the SD card to upload new files.
In a thoughtless trance, I sat patiently in the air around me.
After the files were uploaded, I felt somewhat accomplished.
I had presumed this time was dead time.
But in fact, no time was lost.
The morning and rest of the day went along and my energy was high.
I wonder if I had stayed in bed, circling thoughts round my head,
if I would have felt depleted today instead.

Photo of Jordon Chu
From a shoot we did on the top of our roof.

February 26th 2017

The path you choose to follow in life will not be confirmed or denied by anyone but yourself.

Doubts that stem from fear can lead you to believe things that are not helpful to your growth.

Recognize the power that comes from within.
Even when the light seems dim.

Photo of Julie, one of the best personalities I have met through Instagram. Check out her work here.

February 24th 2017

//
’cause I want to
and I can
so I’m gonna
take this chance
to be a better me
in this life
in this trance
//

February 23rd 2017

//
Past Stardust O’clock

Dreams to stir night visions
Feeding game for the brain.

Earthquakes and body tremors
grow beneath subconscious terrain.

//

Photo of Jordan Corey – go check out her music HERE
Future Soul kind of music. That’s how she put it.

February 22nd 2017

Imagine a rap beat behind these lines.
When I zone out, lyrics come to me.
But I am just a channel.
Here is what came through while I was cooking dinner tonight.
//

Can’t channel my energy right
if i just lose myself
Can’t balance the moon tides
when the sand don’t shine back

These calls in me
Keep calling me
The call I seek
Awake in me

My mama never told me
That these calls I see
Were the same calls that she
Saw in her head at sleep
With me in she

Dead time
with no rhyme
A bucket of piss
to keep me blind

How to let things go
when these things
be safety pins
in the back of my mind

Motion stems from notions
and cautious mindfulness
The potion for this born shit
is nothing but a mind shift.

February 21st 2017

I cherish what makes us different.

//
Him and Her

He sees shapes and patterns in the world
She feels with all her senses

She responds with ‘hahaha.’
‘LOL’ is how he texts it

He guides the way she drives his car
She sees no consequences

She taps into her masculine self
His sense of style’s impressive

No matter what they do or think
Her breath in his condenses
//

February 20th 2017

Poem about daily habits on social media

Scrolling
//
Scrolling, seeking, searching for more.
Split-second glances, reading rapport.
Same type of images, thoughts and tweet wars.
Convenience has long left the bookstore.
Crawling for a glimpse at the great outdoors.
Kindness ensues, emoji hearts – I adore!
New heights become a familiar bore.
They all dance the same on the same dance floor.
//

February 19th 2017

Writer’s block.
Thinker’s pause.
The Artist at struggle.

What to do when your brain feels like popcorn but you can’t seem to do the creative task you want to?

These bursting thoughts that don’t amount to anything but frustration of the self. Knowing you have to produce something to calm your soul, but not knowing where to start could end in a mind blank.

Photography is my main form of creative expression. Taking photos and finding beauty in the world around us has become an addictive mentality I have developed to keep record of my fading mind. Having this drive to produce meaningful photography makes me want to explore other areas of art.

Much like how athletes cross-train to develop new muscles to improve their overall performance, I believe the creative mind must be exercised the same way.

It helps to take a break from your normal ways of creating to try something different. To strengthen other parts of your working brain.

Through writing I have found voice.
Through drawing I have found patience.
Through reading I have found a broader perspective of the world.
And through photography I can capture and make sense of a place and time.

You may find that painting helps you understand light in photography. Or that molding clay has healing properties that make you more relaxed to connect with your higher creative self. I would even throw in cooking as a form of art to try out.

Record your creative process. Draw your energy towards what you find interesting and take it from there.

February 18th 2017

For what can be greater than the good in us all?
We have an abundance of choices in our lives.
Part of feeling free is understanding your options.
We can never truly feel free from the constraints of our mind or body.
Or from the norms of society.
Or really from this life time.
But we can feel free to move about in the best way possible.
From my highest self to yours, I encourage you to find ways to move more freely in your life.
Leave less residue wherever possible.

Photo of my husband, Nordy, right about when it started raining a bunch in Los Angeles last year.

February 17th 2017

Your body is you greatest instrument.
It never leaves you until the day you die.
The body has different limitations from the mind.
And they must operate together for your soul.
One cannot exist without the other in this lifetime.
Maybe one day we can save our minds digitally.
Perhaps we will algorithmically insert virtual bits of our mind to forever last on Earth.
To make it seem like we are still alive in the online world.
How would that be, if your grandchildren could still talk to you when you were long gone?
You would be responding like your body was still alive.
There would be evidence of you left here, in some strange translucent way.

Give your body and your mind what it needs today.
Each day is a little different.
Tune in to tune up.

February 16th 2017

All the world’s love and energy can be tapped into if you stay open.

Give a little. Find a little. Search a little more.

February 15th 2017

Poem inspired by a time when I was waiting outside of a club near downtown Los Angeles.

//
All Sorts of Faces

Blanket to my chin
and my head rests back

3:06 AM
The club is totally packed

A couple stand together
High heels ready to crack

College boy jokes
then turns to yack

Group of girls
dressed in 90’s flashback

Woman had a birthday.
Friends singing out of whack

A wrong worded whisper
A playful smack

Slurry chatters
and drunken click clacks.

Man skates and laughs
like a maniac.

Bright light flashes
from someone’s kodak

The night rolls on.
My blanket is lilac.

//

February 14th 2017

So many Valentine’s Days we experience in our life span living in Western society.

Meaning is what we give to something. Incidents around the Day of Love could be pure coincidence. By happen chance. But this time of year does provide a way to love-check yourself. How is your love life at the moment?

I’ve been dumped on Valentine’s Day.
I was asked out on the same day a couple years before that.
This particular day in 6th grade, a boy confessed his heart out of the bus we were all riding.
And I was mortified.
Completely ignored went one year by someone I was sort of with.
Each year just a little different.

Life will only be as important as you make it out to be.

Hope you all find some time to find that love within yourself and for yourself.

//

February 13th 2017

Time in the Now is where everything happens.
You can’t change the past and cannot predict what may happen in the future.
So in moments when all feels lost or when the world seems unbalanced, it’s important to stay in the present moment.
Recognize the simple things in life at that time to help regain focus.
Your breath.
You alive.
You here.
See yourself where you are sitting or standing.
Imagine looking down on you.
Change happens when you begin.

Calm the breath to calm the heart.


Photo by Terry Mclaughlin

February 12th 2017

//
Formula for rewarding life = Trust + Hope + Perseverance

Photo taken by Nordy

February 10th 2017

Light makes the world come to life.
Happy Full Moon.

The moon will be most full at 4:43 PM PST.
They’re calling this one a ‘Snow Moon.’

To welcome in the full effect of the moon, I am preparing for a ritual.
A simple offering with a white candle and intentions written on a piece of paper.

Manifestations don’t end until you get there.
Conjure up your inner strength to open up more doors in life.
And know, you and your energy are so very powerful.

February 8th 2017

We are part of a huge experiment with social media.
In a couple of decades, we will have studies to refer back to about the implications of the now.
To foresee the impact, we need to understand more deeply how alternate realities affect us.
Our online selves will surpass our human body’s ability to live in this lifetime.
The next coming generations will have an abundance of real-life videos and photos from the past, which will enable the future to better grasp what was going on. The future will have an advantageous verification system. Things won’t be so black and white because they can’t. Life is pretty grey most of the time except for extremes, where there is a clear divide between what is white and what is black.
Everyone is a little different to each other from their online personas. We have personalities that shine through our recorded lives. What we choose to post can say so much about the individual.
The importance of our online selves is rising. Each new job you apply for, the employer will Google you. Every new date you go on will most likely cause you to do some stalking, to gain some clue as to who that other person is. You can spend all day working on your online persona by uploading posts or starting conversations with others. And while that may be beneficial and feel good, we cannot forget our real bodies and the care that is required.
Typically you’ll age just fine in the real world and online if you understand the hype, but not follow it.

February 6th 2017

Rain will pour this whole week in Los Angeles.
Sometimes I forget we live in a desert.
Although I reside 2 miles from the beach, if ever the rain decided to leave forever, we would suffer.
My garden has been left alone for the past month.
Overgrown pathways covered in weeds and grass that found their way here.
The landscape boasting patches of random shrubbery. Wabi Sabi.
For now I don’t mind my yard a mess.
The neighbors haven’t said anything. And it matches the decaying white picket fence.
A poinsettia plant left in the corner, all alone.
Christmas is one big plant massacre. I couldn’t find the guts to toss the red bush last season.
So it sits there. Gathering natural tears from the sky.
A couple pepper plants hang heavy and solemn.
Turning red, green and yellow and almost forgotten.

February 5th 2017

Thoughts on Beauty.

Beauty is the appeal to art.
Art is subjective.
Therefore, in a sense, Beauty must be subjective.
There are rules to Beauty, undeniable truths.
Mathematical-like equations that define the preference in our eyes.
Give it some kind of label.
Like the Golden Rule.
or the Rule of Thirds.
What would Beauty be without pre-existing experiences?
Can Beauty be more of an energy?
If we lost our 5 Earthly senses, could we agree on Beauty?

February 4th 2017

Thoughts on the Human Limit.

Albert Camus says we cannot deny our human limits.
These are limits in our life that are imposed.
We are unable to fly without the help of technology.
Our skin only stretches so far.
Thus, the human has been conditioned to keep trying, to be innovative. Over and over again.
If we stopped and turned around at every failure, we would have been conditioned to fail as a dominate species.
Instead, there exists this fire. This light inside that is fueled by Hope and the knowledge of our limits.

We must accept that things in life cannot be perfectly consistent. Contradictions are essential for growth.

February 3rd 2017

Brain Bait
//
Dreams pack my head
like paper weight

Swimming in and out
of astral gates

Leaving sticky residue,
noticeable traits.

Blurred actions
stir my waking fate.

What happens to brains
when they become dream bait?

February 2nd 2017

Spring Itch
//
Pale February air
dusted by the call
of an aging crow

Spring peeks
in the shadows of
trees in grow

Bare feet cold
shy away from
the show

Dew drops linger
and gather
water flow

Harsh Winter
months seem
long, long ago

My head on a
pillow sings Spring,
here we go.
//

February 1st 2017

Sticky air feels.
Matted, pressed hair.
The wind sends chills.
And I sit here.
Wondering how to create what’s next.
Tight shoulder cramps.
Lemon tinged water
sits in my glass.
Fingertips paused.
Hovered over letters
on a keyboard.
Mind stays still.
The world is open.
A new month.
A new cycle.
What will when you will?

Garage sale thoughts.
Too many items left alone.
Collected, dust-covered,
Untouched timezone.

Let things go.
Less will be more.
Items are weighted
with history
as they collect energies.
Let go to lift up.

January 31st 2017

Hello to the new moon in Aquarius.

Have you been itching to be creative?
This is the time to get your juices flowing.
Stars have aligned for you to take some action.

My focus for this new moon is to create videos.
And to not get frustrated along the way of learning.
Each bump encountered will be accompanied by a big, deep breath.

Learning is a forever act.

Image of Zabriskie Point in Death Valley.

January 29th 2017

All the worlds crisis may never be solved.
All the half hearts may never be filled.
Me and just me alone won’t do.
I struggle. I pause.
I think.
So blue.
With a beating heart and opposable thumbs, I scour my brain for something less numb.
Spilled thoughts pour out and mix around.
I wonder. I wish.
I pray.
Renew.
We have a purpose, let’s not forget
how important it is to take a stance.
Fight, flight or freeze – I will not bow to orders with no intent to help.
Our human race is our human race.
You belong.
I belong.
We don’t always have to get along.
There can be beauty in a mess.

January 28th 2017

Happy Lunar New Year!

My husband and I flew out to Houston last night to visit my parents for the Chinese New Year and my mom’s birthday.

We arrived at 5AM and surprised my brothers who were also visiting and had no idea we were in town.

My household is one of high energy.
It’s been a non-stop motion of dumpling making, visiting old friends and feeling like a kid again. My mom makes the best Chinese food. Ever.

Chinese tradition on birthdays is to eat ‘Long Life Noodles.’ A bowl of noodles prepared with ‘brown-sauce eggs’ to symbolize living to be 100 years old. Noodles make up the 1, the eggs are the 0’s.

Regarding the animal in charge of this year, we wish the fire monkey adieu and welcome in the fire rooster. This new year is thought to bring prosperity and encourage wonderful personality growth.

January 26th 2017

Your presence carries a great deal of energy.
Fill your space with a positive force.
As you encounter others, energies are exchanged.
Be responsible for the type of light you emit.

January 25th 2017

Driving back from yoga this morning, a title of a podcast caught my eye.
“Simply Happy”

It was a Ted Radio Hour podcast about the secrets of happiness.
Or rather, how there is no secret.
Happiness is a human right.
We were actually born to be happy.
That does not mean we have to be happy all of the time.
But it does bring to light methods we can use to squeeze out the most amount of happy-juice.

The more the mind wanders, the more likely you are to think sad thoughts.
This is just human nature.
Mind wandering happens all the time if you’re not paying attention.
We tend to busy ourselves, to create buzz and excitement and fill our time with things to do.
Slow down and simplify your life to feel more enjoyment.
Indulge your mind with what is at hand.

Click here to listen to Ted Radio Hour, Simply Happy.

January 24th 2017

Omelette
//
I made the best
omelette
yesterday
for
me
and
me alone

Sad to say the
omelette
from that day
is
gone.
it
makes me
groan.

The tastiest
omelette
fully stuffed
from
left
overs
once ago

To replicate
would take
a week
or
months
or
gosh!
Who knows?

Cranberry baked
turkey,
mushroom
risotto,
ham
provolone

Spaghetti, sweet
cherries,
pickles,
bloody Mary –
Yes!
the drink
that’s the one.

Spinach and peas,
even more
cheese,
Frito-Lay
chips
and
dip for fun

Forever that
omelette
will
remain
the
best
and
only
one.

January 23rd 2017

Today marks the first day I am doing something for myself, on my own time.
Ever since birth, life has been one big fast track.
Kindergarten turns to middle then high school and then you are zipped off to college.
Right after college came one job and then another.
After 28 years of being on this path, I saw a fork.
I could continue on this train without questions, and would arrive at a wonderful station.
No doubt I would feel like I have done what humans should do in society.
But this emptiness would remain.
I would feel like my human soul had not been utilized completely in this lifetime.
I have something else to offer, and so that other path appeared.
The second path is murky. It feels warmer. And it’s harder to pass through.
The second path could lead to a dead end, but something burning inside me says otherwise.
As unclear as the latter choice seems to be, it makes the most sense in my being.
And so, second path – here I go.

January 21st 2017

Alarm was set for 6AM on a Saturday.
Made plans to meet friends on a train.
Station was packed.
No where to park.
People were everywhere.
Most carried signs
and posters
and wore bright pink hats
with little ears.

Women’s March.
Nationwide participation.
9AM Pershing Square
Downtown Los Angeles.

Also packed.
Oozing in vibrant energy
750,000 people.

Standing in the heart of the march
I looked around and witnessed
love, hope, and patience.

January 20th 2017

If you want change to happen, you have to commit.
100% is best. Start small if you need to. Commit a little until you find how to enjoy the process and how to align your goals.

Commitment means letting go, as opposite as that may seem.
Let go of what has been holding you back.
Let go of past ideas, would be’s and If’s.
Recognize the guiding voices within and believe you can.

Commitment starts with desire.

January 19th 2017

For all I don’t do, thank you
//
I would like to thank you all
In life
for doing
your bit.

The internet exists every day
I’ve never had to fix it.

I couldn’t stop a missile
That’s not within my wit.

To pick a million lemons
for a store, I am unfit.

There would be no electricity
if it all depended on me.

Who would make all of the cake,
cookies, or banana splits?

To all those who do what you do
I humbly bow, I admit

The human race is far from perfect
But the human race can’t quit.

//

Image taken by my love, Nordy.

January 18th 2017

The trumpets are blowing in the sky. Can you hear the call for higher thinking? A higher level of consciousness.

This energy has been tugging at my bones.
It is artistic and very much alive with its own pulse.
Embedded in the notion to heal our society.

You can hold such transitional energy when you take away attachments from materialistic ideas and belongings.

You have the ability to make waves in this society. So, I ask you once more – what are you waiting for?

January 17th 2017

Generations are defined by how a collective group of people experience significant events that shape everybody at the same time.

With technology connecting us together more quickly each day, I wonder if we will be able to collectively change for the better and faster. More ways to communicate, more ways to share. If our web of ideas and thoughts could be accessed by all at once, would we stop wars? Would we know any better?

January 15th 2017

A weekend away
from a place
where everyone
is trying
to stay
was the best
decision
we made
all day.

January 14th 2017

What are you waiting for?

Photo taken courtesy of flight provided by York Galland, also known as @IflyHeli.
We went up right around sunset and flew over downtown Los Angeles to San Pedro Harbor on an R66.

January 13th 2017

Anxiety
//
The stuff that makes your palms sweat
Your heart beat
Your mind blank.
That prickle and tingle
and trickle of fear.
The slight buzz sound
around just one ear.
A body so restless
and void of cheer.

Ripe tightness in the chest
from bubbling nerves
Where did this come from?
My mother?
My birth?
A big breath in
1…2…3…
A pause, a hold
Oh my, oh me!

Quick! Hurry!
You’re wasting time!
Get yourself together
and just be
Fine!

Too much, I can’t.
These thoughts so loud.
These damn darn thoughts
are one big cloud
around my head
inside my heart
Where oh where
do I even start
to try and calm
these tense dark moods
before the storm
forever broods
inside my mind
imprints in time

Is it just me?
Will I be fine?
//

Written in a state of anxiety, palms totally sweating.
Awareness is half the battle. So I am told.

January 12th 2017

Zibu symbols come from Angels.

This particular symbol comes from the Maori culture in New Zealand.
It means Soulmate.
Made me feel when I looked at this symbol.

Soulmate Zibu

Soulmate
//
Words can be too simple.
How can I explain
that I know my soul has
traveled space
and time
and back
again.

There are so many clues
of times long ago
You stand here before me
what were we?
me boy
you girl
or both?

Your touch, too familiar.
Your scent brings me home.
Your heartbeat like a big
Magnet in
sync with
mine and
your own.

How far did we travel
As star dust in space?
How long has it been since
our very
first kiss
and hug
and date?

With all that’s come before
And all that is now
Deep down in my soul
being on
Earth feels
just right
with you.
//

January 11th 2017

Third Eye Mind

//
She woke with such a headache
in the bright, eternal sun.
Unknowing of the forces
disabling an eye – only one.

The one and only eyeball
for the middle of her mind
has been shut down in protest.
To messages, she is blind.

The reason for such severance
comes from prayers long ago
when she cast wishes with
an ache to let more pain go

The eye inside the mind
is a creature of its own.
A sacred space within your brain.
A gift from mystical zones.

The Eye serves to enlighten.
But, if the Self is not quite ready,
the Eye can seem a burden
pushing thoughts much too heavy.

So she’ll wake and wonder
why things are much more quiet.
And why the things she thought before
are now forever silent.
//

filmj451

35mm film

January 10th 2017

Beyond your control

//
There are simply things that happen
in life you can’t control.

It means not you have no power
nor that karma is a troll.

You are simply and beautifully
human, something with a soul.

Bruises, bumps and tiny hiccups –
emotional black holes.

As hectic air rises,
Pause – See things as a whole.

Light is meant to be absorbed.
Enjoy the ride to chase the goal.
//

img_5430

January 9th 2017

Cartoons will run
even when colors wear.

//

Most of the time, a deep breath will do just the trick.

As someone who is attracted to extremes,
it can be tough to find the right balance.

Like how to balance being assertive more than aggressive.
Letting yourself stand strong without imposing against who people are.

Forgiveness on all levels without feeling like the self is being compromised. Embracing the idea that yourself is enough.

When in doubt, I meditate on The High Priestess.

She is someone who sits between the dark and the light.
She symbolizes knowledge of esoteric, occult and philosophical revelations.
She shares sacred mysteries of life to those who are worthy.
She is surrounded by pomegranates, a symbol of duty.
She rules the moon who rules our psychic intuition.

high-priestess

Image by Eric Tecce, the wandering Polymath.

January 7th 2017

Logo to symbolize a state of constant evolution.
Always changing.
Not fully complete.
Going from one cycle to the next.
And enjoying the ride along the way.

cropped-image1-8.jpg

January 6th 2017

Things not for me
//
I blinked one eye
in coffee
to see if
I could sweep
The week’s worth
of distressing sleep
away from
sockets
deep.

It’s not that
I’m insomnic.
Or that I
need more
Z’s.
It’s more my
brain is scattered
doing things
that aren’t
for me.

Patience keeps
on knocking
almost
pounding at
the door.
A couple weeks
is nothing
compared to
forever
more.
//

human3

January 5th 2017

We turn back into gold
//
Deep down beneath
and under our feet
are stories never told.

The clock moves slower
as you go lower
and Earth is very cold.

Rotting parts
with no sweet hearts
and nothing left to hold.

Stacked up layers
of once thought prayers
Earth churns something to gold

Precious pressure
upon these treasures
of humans dead and old

Only Mother Nature,
our planet maker,
creates the way we mold.
//

img_5309

January 4th 2017

Be one with the fresh cycle of the new year.
Wipe the slate from stale thoughts and old habits.
Might as well plant your feet to be swept away with the new.
You’ll find yourself playing catch up the more you resist change.
And yes, change causes friction and friction can be bumpy.
It can be painful but I promise it won’t kill you.
The more open you can be to accepting change,
the more you’ll cycle upwards.

l1010462

January 3rd 2017

SACRED SPACE

An altar, a quiet room, a time for prayer. Sacred carries weight. I was curious to know what Sacred could mean to better understand its complexity.

Merriam Webster Definition

1. Dedicated or set apart for the service or worship of a deity.
Devoted exclusively to service or use

2. Worthy of religious veneration
Entitled to reverence and respect

3. Of or relating to religion

4. Archaic – Accursed

5. Highly valued and important

I had no idea that ‘Sacred’ meant. “Cursed” in old-fashioned times.
Like a blessing in disguise.
Or perhaps fear for those who were different.

l1070759

January 2nd 2017

Since my new iphone in October, I have taken 832 videos and 2800 photos with it.
A coworker asked if I was “always recording?”
Kind of.
Maybe.
Well, not always.
Just the things that I think may be interested to watch when I am old and without much memory.
I have filled up multiple 64G SD cards with my camera in the last few months.
One of my best friends gave us a GoPro as a wedding gift.
And I really want a drone. Something small that can follow me as I go.
With all these ways to track and record our lives, why not make amazing?
Amazing does not have to mean climbing a crazy mountain top for sunrise.
It can.
But Amazing is more of a thought, a way of seeing something at that particular time.
Amazing can be anything you want it to be.
You are the one who makes it amazing.

January 1st 2017

Let it begin.
Be more curious this year.
Let your mind wander and wonder.
What could be
if you let it?

l1006942

December 31st 2016

A whirlwind of a year 2016 has been. A see-saw, going back and forth between being awesome and being a shit show.
I am so very thankful for the good that has happened.
All the dreams that were made.
For the future to hold.
May 2017 bring you all you hope for and beyond.

l1040731

December 30th 2016

The older I grow, the more I realize how important it is to control where and how you spend your time.

Our brains make a certain amount of glucose when we sleep. As you wake and move about the day, every single thought and action zaps glucose. And you don’t make any more until you go back go sleep.

The more you waste your time, the more you waste your energy.

img_5118

December 29th 2016

My mind is most creative when my closet is clean.

img_5067

Photo by Nordy. We found a little cave at Red Rock Canyon, Nevada.

December 28th 2016

Seeking systematic synchronicity.
Those moments where things align.
When that happens, focus on the thought you were on.
What were you just thinking about?

l1070143

The best form of inspiration is inspiring another.

December 27th 2016

//
Put your mind at ease
And appease
the plea
for need
//

human1

December 26th 2016

El Centro, California

Short video where we looked into an abandoned wheat silo.

December 25th 2016

If we were both eleven
//
Imagine if we had been friends
When we were both eleven.
I’d hold your hand
We’d skip around
And play worlds of pretend.

What if we had grown up
When our time clocks
were the same?

You’d be my age
Or I’d be yours
And time wouldn’t be
this game.

What if we never lost
what we are
as we grow?
Could you still
be eleven?
I’ll hold on to
Your photo.
//

img_4574

Photo of me and my grandma, Betty.
Florida Keys – July 2016

December 24th 2016

//
’tis the first Christmas spent with a new family.
People and blood from a whole different tree.
//

human7

December 23rd 2016

Shut the blinds
//
Scrambled brains for morning breakfast.
I turn my pillow over.
Flipped bedsheets
soaked in heavy dreams.
I inch a little closer.
The lumpy mass of sinking snores
says morning has been extended.
I close my eyes for slumber more
and now my mind is rested.
//

img_3493

December 22nd 2016

Blank tape
//
In times of total silence
My mind blanks into a trance.
No thoughts to drip
or eyes to blink
and muscles cease to breathe.
As if time was forgotten
like an oven timer, beep beeping
Who is there to witness
such a moment
in
complete
//

DSC08351

December 21st 2016

//
Be not afraid of potential
Fear stems from doubt
Feeling disillusioned can lead to self awareness
When one cycle ends
another begins.
To transition fully,
let go of old beliefs and patterns.
Those things that do not fulfill
the new you
The ever changing you.
//

dsc06707

December 20th 2016

fullsizerender

OMNIST – one that believes in all religions.

Belief that not one religion holds all truth, and that truth can be found in all religions.

dsc09196

December 19th 2016

When the silence in the office grows too strong,
I seek light to drown in.

image1-2

I can’t grow anywhere but Up.

Processed with VSCO with b5 preset

Processed with VSCO with b5 preset

Something daily to keep the mind moving along with this spinning planet.

filmj329

October 18th, 2016

Assert energy in positive light.
Walk the fine balance between being yourself, and being assertive.
Act with love.
And be sure to act
because it is the right thing to do.
When conversations get sticky and confusing,
Take a moment to reflect on how fair the talk is going.
Are you backing into yourself?
Foresee the tipping point.